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The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.
I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.
To the Honourable Member opposite I say, when he goes home tonight, may his mother run out from under the porch and bark at him
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Research is what I\'m doing when I don\'t know what I\'m doing.
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If it wasn\'t for lawyers, we wouldn\'t need them.
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Incrementing C by 1 is not enough to make a good object-oriented language.
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He managed to stupid himself right into the White House.
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Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.
If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.
The worst crimes were dared by a few, willed by more and tolerated by all.
TV is called a medium because it is neither rare nor well done.
Total absence of humor renders life impossible.
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The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.
Premature optimization is the root of all evil.
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I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.
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Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proven it correct, not tried it.
War is not the continuation of politics with different means, it is the greatest mass-crime perpetrated on the community of man.
A state of war only serves as an excuse for domestic tyranny.
The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of an expanding bureaucracy.
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TV is called a medium because it is neither rare nor well done.
Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?
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People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.
It\'s not the size of the dog in the fight, it\'s the size of the fight in the dog.
O\'Toole\'s Corollary of Finagle\'s Law: The perversity of the Universe tends towards a maximum.
I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
You\'re about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.
How safe are electronic cigarettes?
It\'s impossible to experience one\'s death objectively and still carry a tune.
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Premature optimization is the root of all evil.
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Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.
What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance
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I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.
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To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that\'s ok because you\'ll be a mile away from him and you\'ll have his shoes.
That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.
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Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can\'t remember what they are.
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The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That\'s where we come in; we\'re computer professionals. We cause accidents.
Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?
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Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn\'t cure.
It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong.
I\'m always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can\'t understand is, if they don\'t know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?
The right to swing my fist ends where the other man\'s nose begins.
The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there\'s no law against whacking them around a bit.
Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.
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You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.
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I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.
How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
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I\'m not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.
Heav\'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn\'d, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn\'d.
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A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
War doesn\'t make boys men, it makes men dead.
Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.
I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.
Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.
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Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.
Where are we going, and why am I in this handbasket?
Statistics is like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive. What they conceal is vital.
Democracy is where you can say what you think even if you don\'t think.
We are Dyslexia of Borg. Fusistance is retile. Your ass will be laminated.
A mind all logic is like a knife all blade. It makes the hand bleed that uses it.
A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.
Java: the elegant simplicity of C++ and the blazing speed of Smalltalk.
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When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I\'ve never tried before.
If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and no-one dares criticize it.
Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.
Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems.
You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.
Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.
I\'m all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let\'s start with typewriters.
The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they\'re going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
The use of anthropomorphic terminology when dealing with computing systems is a symptom of professional immaturity.
Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?
All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there\'s no risk of accident for someone who\'s dead.
When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world.
Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.
It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong.
Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven\'t said enough.
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I\'d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
A mind all logic is like a knife all blade. It makes the hand bleed that uses it.
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Invading Iraq after 9/11 was like invading Mexico after Pearl Harbor.
They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction.
In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently
The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.
Subtlety is the art of saying what you think and getting out of the way before it is understood.
Everybody\'s worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there\'s a really easy way: stop participating in it.
Tact is the ability to tell a man he has an open mind when he has a hole in his head.
Having the source code is the difference between buying a house and renting an apartment.
If it wasn\'t for lawyers, we wouldn\'t need them.
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.
In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it\'s the exact opposite.
The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn\'t get bigger or heavier.
Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proven it correct, not tried it.
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The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
Total absence of humor renders life impossible.
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War is not the continuation of politics with different means, it is the greatest mass-crime perpetrated on the community of man.
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A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.
One out of every three Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of two of your best friends. If they are OK, then it must be you.
Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.
Wit makes its own welcome and levels all distinctions.
Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?
You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Biologically speaking, if something bites you it\'s more likely to be female.
Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers.
Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?
A man can\'t be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
Diplomacy is the art of saying \'Nice doggie!\'... \'til you can find a rock.
Many a man\'s reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.
A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light
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Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn\'t work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.
If there?s one thing I know it?s God does love a good joke.
A [pseudo]random number generator is much like sex: when it\'s good it\'s wonderful, and when it\'s bad it\'s still pretty good.
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Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.
There is no idea so simple and powerful that you can\'t get zillions of people to misunderstand it.
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Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.
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Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.
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The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
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最終更新日 : 2012/01/26/(Thu) 10:26
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